The New Conformism

Conformist - That is a word many of those who know me use, to describe me. Some might even disagree! I have never denied that and was always comfortable with that aspect of myself. How am I a conformist? Well, to put it flatly - I confirm.

I have realised this more in the last 2-3 years and even more so after I started my long and arduous MBA journey (which is 2 weeks away from its much awaited end). My reports always followed formats. If exhibits were required in my case analyses, I ensured I had one at least - sometimes even when I felt that there really was no need. If the prescribed word count was 1200, I had 1199 or 1201 but never way off the mark. I was always confirming, always meeting the standard someone else prescribed. One might argue that these were academic requirements and not fulfilling them would be, well, deviating from the norm. See? Do you see the conformist in me yet?

Don't be fooled - I am not disappointed nor am I unhappy with myself. I am at peace with my conformist self, more so today than ever. Let me tell you why.

I remember one occasion recently when I wore a dark blue blazer, grey trousers, plain white shirt and a striped tie. It was one of your 'formal attire' events and this was my definition of formal attire. A 'friend' of mine met me prior to this event, gave me a dekko and said - "Dude, that is so conformist" and then went on to highlight past events when he thought my approach was such. I listened patiently, agreeing with everything he had to say, coz well he wasn't lying. I couldn't deny anything he said but yet, in my mind it all made sense.

I used to work with a bank before I took up my MBA and am returning to the same industry after I finish it. It is a 'safe' career bet. A lot of people have made it their business to tell me that it is so 'typically' me to do something I am comfortable with, something which is in my 'comfort zone'. Again, as always, I maintain my silence and not offer any arguments to the contrary. It is true - How do you argue with that?

I can offer no explanations and I guess there are truly none for why I am like this. On a deeper level there really is no need for any. Although, I can tell you what happened at the formal event, I mentioned earlier - I walked in and I was the only guy wearing the 'typically me' combination but I could count at least three other people wearing very identical and rather contemporary styles that are popular these days... the fourth was my wise friend. He is among the other 'non-conformists' I know, who have been through various courses, various jobs in various industries with many different companies and still struggling to find an area of expertise, while at least I know what I am talking about.

Everywhere around me - It is cool to be apathetic, everyone I meet either doesn't care or worse doesn't know but somehow it is a 'new age' crime to have a political opinion. I see people walk around in their converse shoes (keds and what not) but I am the only one wearing my Nike Joggers on the whole street. Suddenly, I feel threatened - Coz I am not the conformist anymore! I am the one who is 'different', I am the one who is 'standing out'.